Vasectomy was the Topic of the Day in the Barbershop

11/01/19 22:25 Bethlehem, PA

Listening to a podcast of Henry Rollins of his latest radio show.  Fanatics.  He is a fanatic about music.  It’s amazing, Henry is an encyclopedia for punk, jazz, free verse, speed metal, deep.  The Ruts?  Segs? Who is this guy? 

This afternoon, I heard an interview The Slits guitarist on the radio as I drove to Tim’s Barbershop. I passed the store to check if it was empty.  It was.  I walked in.  One guy was getting his haircut, for the record, he was getting it very short. I sat down and was quickly sucked into the conversation.  What do two men talk about in a barber shop?  Getting a vasectomy.  The topic made me cringe.  Tim was giving sound advice, don’t keep your testicles too clean afterwards. The surgery will not heal.  After three weeks there were still the holes where instruments were used to cut and burn the tips…of tender veins.  I added the tender veins in the previous sentence for dramatic purposes.  I was dying, even now as I’m typing this, he said one of his friends had clamps inserted and they are still there.  Tiny clamps on his vein?  Let’s shake off the image of clamps floating around said testicle.  The guy getting his haircut was going to have his vasectomy in the near future. His face changed, he looked faint, his eyes were glazing over, and I thought I saw his lips tremble out of fear and dread.  Let’s move on from this subject.  Wait, hold on, before I leave, years ago…many years…I remember getting checked out for the possible minor surgery.  The snip and off you go!  The stories I heard; for instance, one of the guys I worked with said he had it done…he drove there alone. On the way home he had a flat.  He had to change his tire.  The pain was unbearable.  Anyway, the doctor looked at me and said I would require a more thorough surgery since one of the veins was enlarged.  He asked if I was injured.  I was.  I was kicked severely when I was playing soccer when I was a kid.  I saw colored lights blasting behind my eyes, and soon after my testicle was black and blue and swollen.  There, I said it.  After the doctor gave me the much needed excuse…not to have surgery.  I came home and explained carefully what he said. I was relieved. What did my ex say?  I think you need a second opinion. 

Thank you for reading this.