11/8/14 22:33 Follow your bliss
Earlier today, I went for a walk in the woods. I needed to get in among the trees and the swirling leaves that tumbled down. It was a clear day. Originally, I had the idea to take Ma on what I will refer to as the Merton tour. Thomas Merton. There are a few places within our vicinity which we can stop at and make a day out of. For now we are planning for next week. Hope ma does not get too nervous with my driving. I can sense the dread she may have of driving her into the city. She will close her eyes and pray to Mary and Joseph and may choose to sit in the back seat; which she did when I took her to Plains Georgia to see Jimmy Carter.
What is your bliss? Joseph Campbell wrote, make yourself transparent to transcendent. He wrote of having an energy flow through you. All of us are capable of being conduits to this force or power or grace of God. I was looking for this energy in the woods. There were a few distractions and interruptions, a woman walking two dogs, one a pit bull. Keep away. Couples walked pass, I would nod to the man. I walked to the edge of the lake and behind me over hear one woman who recalled out loud to her husband, friend, brother, when they jumped in the water last summer, which must seem like a hazy memory as the chilly winds rippled over the bare branches. Did I find the bliss in the woods? There were moments of peace. Not enough. It may have been due to the throbbing pain of needing to piss which was a mighty distraction. I could go behind a tree. But each time I thought I was alone, I would hear a panting dog or a voice and I tightened the muscles and moved over stiff roots which liked to pop up and trip me.
It was a good hike in the woods. It was the first time in Blydenburgh Park in what must be close to 40 years. I searched for the camp grounds and could see some in the distance. I had camped there when I was in the Cup Scouts and recall making the significant accomplishment of not sleeping with my blankie. I suffered the painful withdrawal for a whole weekend for fear of being ridiculed by those malicious scouts. I could imagine their twisted faces as they gazed at my fabric contentment. What’s that? I’d hold it up since I was caught. It’s my…blankie. With that, they’d take it away. Truth is; I would do the same to some unsuspecting wimp. I could see them hold it like it was a prize and tell me, See this? This is my knife and I am going to cut it up and toss it into the fire. I would not dare the humiliation or the loss of my precious blankie. So, the moment when I was back inside my home, I heard, how was it? No time for explaining. I needed to get reacquainted. I was on a mission. So, I half waved at Dad, barely said hello to Dave who was happy to see me and Eileen who was springing around and Sheila who was in a high chair. I needed it. I ran full speed to my bedroom to find my filthy rag. It was my rag. My blankie. It smelled the same. I closed my eyes. It was my bliss.
Thank you for reading this.